Save the Women!

Marriage and money pays for sex

Posted in child bride,Islam,relations with Saudi men,religion,Saudi Arabia,women by Save the Women! on July 30, 2010

Officially people will state that mahr is an expression of the husband of his love and appreciation of his to be bride.

In sharia law you will see it is different. I am sorry but Mahr (or faridah) is indeed money paid for sexual acces.
In case the wife asks for divorce she will also have to pay back the mahr, even though sex has taken place. Officially this should not be but in reality sharia courts will demand it. If they grant divorce to a woman at all.
Divorced muslim women will also loose their children to the father always. They are property of the father.
Also the father has to pay no maintenance for a divorced wife except the three months after divorce. These three months are to see if the woman is not pregnant. If she is she will have to give that child to the father also.
It seems to be expected that the woman will then be able to sell herself again for board and upkeep to another man.

If she does not manage to attract another man and she has no family willing to look after her she will have nothing.
The word niqah means only ”marriage” in the marriage document. In all other use of the word in arabic language it means ”penetration”

The fact that Mahr is meant as money paid for sex follows from the following:
– there should be no sex until the promised mahr has been paid fully, although some modern women ask for only part of their mahr, the rest to be paid in case of divorce.
Don’t forget that her mahr is the only provision a wife will have in case of divorce.
-Although some scholars say that the mahr should be paid after consummation.
-In case of death before consummation the widow will have to give back half the mahr to the family of the diseased husband.
-In case of no consummation her guardian can also forgive all the mahr
-It is haram to enjoy relations with a wife and then deny her the mahr when she demands (sounds very much like sex for money doesn’t it?)

One author of the Hanafi School defines the mahr as “the money, which is obligatory on the husband in ikd al-nikah (the marriage contract) for manafi’ al-bid’ (sexual pleasure). (See ibn al-Hamam, Sharih Fath al-Qadeer, vol. 3, p. 304, Arabic version).

The Hanbali School of jurisprudence defines mahr as “the money paid by the husband for the purpose of nikah (marriage). (See ibn Kadamah, Al-Mughni, vol. 6, p. 679, Arabic version).

The Malike and Shafi’i Schools defines the mahr as “the money due to the future wife in return for [the husband’s] haqq al-isstimta’ (sexual pleasure) in the marriage contract”. (See al-Hattab Muhammad bin Abdel Rahman al-Mughrabi, Mawahib al-Jalil li-Sharh Mukhtassar Khalil, vol. 5, p. 172-Maliki Jurisprudence). For Shafi’i School see al-Nawawi, Kitab al-Majmu’, vol. 18 p. 605). All these references are cited by Sheikh Mahmud Muhammad al-Sheikh, Al-Mahr fi Al-Islam bayna al-madi wal-hadir, published by al-Maktaba al-Assriyya liltibaa’a wal nashr, Beirut, Lebanon, 2003, Arabic version.
The Maliki and Shafi’i Schools of jurisprudence regard the mahr as “the money paid for the future wife in return for sexual pleasure is an integral part of the Islamic marriage contract and its source is prescribed in the Qur’an

The Maliki School regards a marriage to be legal if it was consummated. If the marriage was not consummated, then the marriage is mafsookh (a reason for separation); if he divorces his wife without any agreement on the mahr issue, then he has to pay her mut’ah (money paid to her in return for the sexual pleasure he had with her). But if he dies before any agreement reached between the couple, then the wife is entitled to inherit her share from his estate.


10 Responses to 'Marriage and money pays for sex'

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  1. x said,

    From Sweden.
    muslims want to kill Sweden artists so *** them.
    If muslims kill Sweden artists, is it self defense to kill muslims?
    Help to cure muslim children from islam and send them this info to them, “prophet” mohammed was haram.
    Girls read quran sura bina 60.
    When “prophet” mohammed was 50 year old he marry Aisha a 6 year old child and when Aisha was 9 “prophet” mohammed rape Aisha so he was a *** pedophile and a slave owner so *** him.
    Watch and read mohammed T-shirt art from Sweden at,
    Not mine ip nr

    Edit by me because of bad language. I find the whole comment close to the edge but I will allow it for now

  2. Aafke-Art said,

    Sounds more like a concubine’s contract to me than a partnership between equals.
    Oh, but what a stupid thing to say: how can it be a partnership between equals when the female is of a lower order of beings altogether….
    No wonder women demand a large mahr.
    Mine would be horrendous if I had to submit to such an unequal, unstable, unsafe and unfair situation as a Sharia marriage.

  3. ali said,

    Mahr is paid to SECURE a woman financially in case she is divorced later one BY the husband. It is not JUST for the sex …Also, a woman cannot be “married” .. she has to CHOOSE to be married. The return of “mahr” is case of “KHula” where she CHOOSES to walk away.
    Now, what the judge does is something else here. That is for the government to look into. Is the judiciary 100% fair? No. Nowhere on earth is it 100% fair.
    Aafke.. men and women are equal in rights and different in nature.
    If ” Muslim” Countries do not implement Sharia 100%, it is their loss because then they WILL be classified as SICK SOCIETIES.. and they are. By Who? The world, their OWN nations.. and thus the turmoil in these societies.

    • Ali.
      -in Sharia Mahr is for sex. All experts agree on that. But yes, it is also the only money she can expect if the man divorces her, or if he dies, or if she manages (against all odds) to get a divorce.
      In sura nisaa a woman is advised to pay back her mahr in case of khula if she is rich and he is poor.
      Not per default. Only if she is rich and he is poor, and even then it is nice of her.
      Also a woman could put in her contract that the man cannot take a second wife, as the granddaughter of the prophet did. Or that she can get her divorce if he takes a second wife. And of course she should not have to pay back mahr, after all: he has had the sex, and he has lied to her when he promised not to take a second wife.
      BTW, that is not ”choosing” that is being ”driven to it”.

      But of course no saudi judge will allow women any justice.
      In saudi it is not ”not 100% fair” you know this very well if you are saudi, that the courts are 100% AGAINST women.
      unless they have a lot of money to bribe them.
      I know of no woman whi instigated a divorce, no matter how deservved, without paying bribes to the judge and the husband.

      And many women in saudi are TOLD they will be married. Saying no does not come into it. remaining silent is taken as a yes, and in the disguise of veiling it has even happened that another girl has been to the nikah and agreed on another girls account. Who is to know?

      Btw, there are several times that the prophet released, or offered to release, women who came to him claiming they were married off against their will, or that they were not attracted to their husband.
      So Mohammed was for releasing women from marriages they did not want. Or were forced into.

  4. ali said,

    Also, it is expected of a man to provide everything, bear all expenses alone, work and provide. How can equality exist?

    • In Islam there is n o equality.
      And that is wrong. A mistake.
      We can see every day that women, as one half of humanity, are not in any way less than men.
      We see proof all around us all the time that women and men are equal.
      So Islam is wrong on this point
      I think it was just a rule Mohammed wanted to imply.

  5. Daisy said,

    Save the women,
    Carol had written a post on Mahr last year and I had said there Mahr is for marital sex. Many people opposed me till I gave quotations from Quran to show what this word actually meant. I don’t remember if you participated in that discussion there.

    What Ali says here about Mahr being postponed till divorce is an Indian practice. Indian Muslims usually don’t take Mahr at the time of marriage, but postpone it till the time of possible divorce. If there is no divorce, the wife usually condones the Mahr payment at the time of the death of her husband or her own death, whichever happens first. Of course, Indian Muslims are influenced by the other religions they are surrounded by, which don’t have the system of bride price for marital sex.

    Here is the link of Carol’s post where I had made this discussion –

    • @ Daisy, Greetings yes, people either do not realise, or do not like to tell non muslims mahr is for sexual access.
      Therefore it is doubly mean to insist a woman pays back her mahr if she wants a divorce, after all, she has dlivered the goods. She is far l;ess valuable on the marriage market. In Saudi Arabia most divorced or widowed women can only aspire to being a second or third wife, or a misyaar marriage.
      I consider misyaar scholar sanctioned prostitution by the way.

  6. Daisy said,

    In Islam marriage is a contract for sex. Essentially, a man gives lodging, food and clothes to a woman in exchange for her sexual services to him whenever he wants it.

    It is remarkable that medical care doesn’t come under the purview of “maintenance” of a wife in puritanical Islam. The children born from this relationship belong to the man for inheritance reasons.

    You may be aware of the Hadith which says that Muhammad had a wife who had grown old and Muhammad wanted to divorce her (because he didn’t want to have sex with her since she was old?)

    This wife pleaded to him that she had nowhere to go if he divorced her and asked him to spend her share of “nights” with Aisha whom Muhammad loved the most. Thus, this old wife bought her “maintenance” from Muhammad by giving away her sexual rights to Aisha. Obviously, she couldn’t have “sold herself” again at her old age and her close kinsmen were either unable to maintain her or they had died.

    There is also another Islamic rule, which says that if a man doesn’t have sex with his wife for 3-4 months (I forget if it is 3 or 4), he will be regarded as divorced from her.

    Thus, if Muhammad didn’t want to have sex with his old wife, he couldn’t stay married to her and she couldn’t stay in his house as his wife. Hence, he wanted to divorce her.

    • @ Daisy,
      i have often thought that the Islamic view on women, men, sex and marriage is in essence a view where women have to prostitute themselves to have the basics of life: food clothing protection.
      as the inheritance laws make sure women will be much poorer than men. there also seems no escape. men have the money and economical power, and women can only participate in that if they consent to serve a man.

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